Monday, December 20, 2010

Reappearing.

I know I've disappeared for a few days. But I needed the break, I needed to get my head straightened out and deal with a few issues.

But I'm back!

So let's see, what's new with me. I've decided to go visit my friends. After a few follow-up conversations they seemed quite realistic with their expectations of me, and I know that I need to challenged myself and get out of my "safe zone". I am apprehensive and nervous, but nothing ventured nothing gained, right?

And yesterday I celebrated my birthday. Nothing HUGE happened, but I had an enjoyable day. I went Christmas shopping in the morning, baked some Christmas cookies in the afternoon and drank champagne and mulled wine in the evening while watching a relaxing movie. There are simple joys that make you just as happy as a big wild party. And it's good to remember that from time to time. Also I realized just how loved and cared about I was, because an amazing amount of people remembered my birthday. I'm terrible at remembering other's birthdays though, it's something I need to work on.

Now I'm caught up in preparations for my upcoming trip. Since I'm travelling in between countries there's travelling arrangements to take care of, not to mention packing and all the other last minute things that add up. But I will be blogging and hopefully will put up some pictures of my trip once I have them.

ED yells at me sometimes that I'm making the wrong choice, that I will end up in a place where I am miserable and unhappy the whole time, that I will gain tons of weight and feel guilty. But you know what, I'm not listening. This is my life and I'm tired of living it in the prison cell of an ED. One thing that finalized my decision to go on this trip was a question I asked myself : "If I didn't have an ED, would I go?" The answer was "Yes!!!" So what's standing in my way? Absolutely nothing. I am free and I'm off to have a great time.

Hope you all are having a wonderful, enjoyable holiday season.

3 comments:

  1. Happy belated birthday! I wish I would have known; I always feel bad about saying it a day late. I'm not great at remembering other's birthdays so that's one of the few reasons I still keep a facebook profile (I really dislike fb). I hope you have a great time visiting your friends and remember that it's more than just eating, you get to do so much more with them and before you know it you won't focus so much on the food and you'll be too involved in having a good time to care. ;)

    And the evening you had for your birthday (the whole day actually) sounds so nice and peaceful, just the way I'd like my birthday to be.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Happy Birthday!! I hope you have such a wonderful time on your trip. You fully deserve it :)

    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  3. HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL!!! *HUG*

    I'm glad you decided to go. Though your friends made me a little upset at their first comments I don't know them personally. BUT I am fully behind you going and having a wonderful time!! YOU WILL KICK ED'S BUTT!! :)

    Merry Christmas!

    ~Lily

    ReplyDelete